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What Does It Take to Face Extreme Adversity and Be One of 16 Survivors out of 45 Passengers?

I recently had the privilege of hearing Nando Parrado speak about his harrowing experience in the Andes plane crash in 1972.  You may have seen the movie or read the book Alive, or read Parrado’s book Miracle in the Andes.  Last week my article was about overcoming adversity: An Unbelievable but True Story about Emotional Resilience, and again, this week the theme continues…

How much adversity can a human being endure?  

What gives us hope in times of extreme desperation?  

What creates such determination of spirit?

In Nando Parrado’s talk, he summarized the 72 days of living in peril.  He is a humble man, and does not wish to be thought of as a hero.  He explained that he had a very strong will to live and made the decision, that if he was going to die, it would be while attempting to escape vs. waiting for someone for find them.  His mother and sister had both died in the same airplane crash, and knowing that his father was at home grieving the loss of his entire family, motivated him to take the necessary steps toward getting closer to his father.  He knew the chances of challenging the Andes and surviving were almost zero but he also knew that he had to try.  He had to face adversity in the most extreme circumstances one can imagine.

The survivors were members of the Uruguay Ruby team.  They were close friends and knew how to work together as a team.  Without appointing one another, they naturally took on different roles, some were the “doctors”, others were the planners, others took on leadership roles and so forth.  All they could focus on was the fact that they were still breathing despite the freezing cold, lack of supplies, lack of food and water, and an avalanche that killed more of the survivors inside the fuselage – the main body of the aircraft that was still semi-intact.  The leaders appeared because of their actions.  As a group, they made the decision that the only way to survive would be to eat the flesh and organs of the passengers, (their close friends and family) who had died and whose bodies were preserved in the snow.

On the Importance of Family

For Nando Parrado, the love for his father and what family meant to him, saved him and 15 other men.  He went on to marry a beautiful wife and raise two lovely daughters who he acknowledges in the dedication of his book:  “To Veronique,Veronica, and Cecilia.  It was all worth it. I would do it all again for you.”  Nando Parrado may be the owner of 5 different businesses, yet his family is his number one priority.  In times of economic downfall, his focus is his family.  The important message being that we can all adapt to losing a home,  losing financial investments, or losing a job, but family is irreplaceable.  As long as we have family and we’re alive, problems are not unsurmountable.

On Love

Death has an opposite, but the opposite is not mere living. It is not courage or faith or human will. The opposite of death is love. How had I missed that? How does anyone miss that? Love is our only weapon. Only love can turn mere life into a miracle, and draw precious meaning from suffering and fear. For a brief, magical moment, all my fears lifted, and I knew that I would not let death control me. I would walk through the godforsaken country that separated me from my home with love and hope in my heart. I would walk until I had walked all the life out of me, and when I fell I would die that much closer to my father.
― Nando Parrado, Miracle in the Andes

On Being Pragmatic

Nando Parrado credits  his father for teaching him to be pragmatic.  He doesn’t believe in looking back.  He believes in consciously living in the present.  He believes that life is just the way it is, and may not always be how we want it to be.  He enjoys what life brings him.

On Setting An Example for Children

He believes that children are taught by example.  Whatever family values you model will remain with your children.  What children experience at home, is what they learn.

As Nando Parrado states, luck contributed to his survival (he was in row 9 when the plane crashed and everyone in row 10 and higher died).  However, his pragmatic mindset, his fitness level, his tenacity, his devotion and love to his family are also the resilience factors that brought him home.

We all need inner resources to keep us going during challenging times, what are your inner resources and what are your children’s?  Is there a way to further support and nurture our children’s individual inner resources?

In my groups for children 7-9 years and 10-12 years we focus on building up our inner resources through strategies and mindset.  For more information on my next round of “Brain Science” groups to teach children about anxiety, please see this Anxiety Management Flyer.

Warmly,