I have a made a video which will be valuable for you, your child and teen. It is an evidence-based tool to help with feelings of shame, anxiety, depression etc. (See video below: Tapping for Self-Compassion)
In my last blog, I talked about shame and the causes of shame. I also included an image of a Monster of Shame looking at a child, created by Chris Van Dyck, which you can print up here and use to dialogue with your child/teen.
Your child/teen may feel like a monster when they feel shame or it may feel as though there is a monster in their mind telling them that they are not good enough and that they are a very flawed human being.
One of the antidotes to shame is self-compassion.
It’s helpful to externalize these two streams of thought – the one of shame and the one of self-compassion. Using these two images, you can ask your child to imagine what each “voice” would say and encourage them to believe in the voice of self-compassion.
It’s also important to remind them that not all our thoughts are real. Therefore, when we have shameful thoughts we do not need to think of them as facts. We can give ourselves loving and self-compassionate thoughts instead.
One of the ways to do this is through the Emotional Freedom Technique known as Tapping. Tapping can be used by children, teens and adults. There is a lot of scientific evidence to support that tapping is effective.
The method involves a “setting up” statement, followed by tapping on 8 acupressure points on the face and body, which is repeated for at least three rounds. The setting up statement sounds like: “Even though I feel this shame, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
I have made a short video for you to model how tapping is done for shame, and for anxiety. You can also use tapping for anger, depression etc.
Click here to watch how to do tapping for yourself and/or child/teen. Just repeat my words and tapping motions on the 8 acupressure points. This is an evidence-based tool…it takes just a few minutes and is worth a try…no negative side-effects and hopefully you feel lots of positive side effects!
I’d love to hear how this tapping exercise goes for you,
Warmly,
Sharon
PS. My assistant, Tracy, has done a wonderful job getting registration set up early for the September 2024 Brain Science groups to teach anxiety management skills to children ages 7-9 and 10-12 (in-person and online). You can find out more and register here.
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