November is known as a time when depression rates are higher, for those who live in areas where November becomes markedly colder and rainier, and the darkness of night comes much sooner. There is plenty of evidence which states that November is a peak time for depression and I see it in my counselling practice every year.
Some people struggle with Seasonal Affective Disorder, a subtype of depression and use light therapy as one way of helping to manage this.
How Can We Support Ourselves and Our Children through November?
If we are more attentive to the changing of the seasons, we can be more conscious of taking care of our souls. As the weather changes, we may often feel the desire to curl up on a couch, sit in front of a cozy fire, drink more hot drinks, and nourish ourselves with homemade soups and delicious slow-cooker meals.
We are not meant to be machines that are always on the go. We have souls and we need to take care of our souls and our children’s souls. November is the perfect month for listening to ourselves, slowing down, being cozy, nurturing ourselves and others, and reconnecting inside our homes through board games, family movie nights, quiet time and stories.
There are times where we feel the need to be more internal. This quiet and introspective time is refuelling.
During the month of November, leaves fall and return to the earth, some animals prepare for their upcoming hibernation and we may choose to see November as an internal, reflective month vs. a gloomy month.
If we expect to continue being as external, social and busy as we were during the summer months and September/October, November may then come as a disappointment. However, if we view November (and teach our children to expect November) to be a shift from external to internal, we may learn to appreciate November as a special time of the year for regrouping.
Do you have any family rituals that are specifically carried out in November?
Perhaps this November, as a family, it could be a good time to create some cozy November rituals?
“…to the soul, the most minute details and the most ordinary activities, carried out with mindfulness and art, have an effect far beyond their apparent insignificance.”
― Thomas Moore, Care of the Soul: A Guide for Cultivating Depth and Sacredness in Everyday Life
Being Aware of The Soul’s Needs
“Don’t take anything literally but always look deeper. For example, if you drink too much, what is your soul looking for in the alcohol? If you eat too much, what part of your soul is in need of nourishing? Think poetically and never respond on a surface level.”
― Thomas Moore, Care of the Soul Twenty-fifth Anniversary Edition: Guide for Cultivating Depth and Sacredness in Everyday Life
For children and teens in school, November is often a tough month. The novelty and excitement of the new school year has worn off and the reality of the long school days and homework nights settles in. For high school students, November brings them that much closer to first term report cards and the pressure they place on themselves sinks in, as they know there’s just a few more tests or assignments until the first term marks are complete.
What is your child’s behaviour telling you? Behaviour is always communication.
How can you support your child, yourself, your spouse, your family?
Perhaps the family calendar needs some more unscheduled days. Perhaps candles, fires and bubble baths would be welcomed? Food is a wonderful way to nourish the soul, and eating the local seasonal food is another way of connecting with this time of year and appreciating what November brings.
Expressing Gratitude in November to Increase Happiness and Reduce Depression
There is an abundance of research which shows that gratitude increases happiness/well-being and reduces depression. You may like to try the following experiment yourself and/or with your family.
Here’s a very short six question questionnaire that has been used in research on gratitude. Score yourself now, and then practice gratitude at least three times/week during the month of November.
Ways to practice gratitude:
- Keep a gratitude journal and write down three things, for which you’re thankful, at least three times/week
- Meditate with a focus on everything, for which you are grateful
- Be thankful to others – write/text notes of appreciation for others, practice acts of random kindness, hold family meetings on a weekly basis and begin each meeting with everyone expressing gratitude
At the end of November, go back to the mini questionnaire and see if your score has increased.
November is also the month when we honour those who fought in wars to bring us peace. Let’s think of November as a month where we focus on our appreciation for having peace in our country and nurturing ourselves and our family members to feel peace in our mind, bodies and souls.
Life is full of opposite energies and November brings an opposite energy to Summer.
“Humans, just like the natural world, are meant to cycle through seasons of dormancy and new life, activity and contemplation, celebration and sadness, blossom and harvest, openness and closedness, austerity and abundance.”
~ Adam McHugh
Wishing you a peaceful November,
Warmly,
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