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 How to Make Transitions Easier? How to Make The Back-To-School Routine Easier?

Our family is experiencing major transitions as we have just returned from our home-exchange summer in France, and now we are getting back into our routines and preparing for school.  I have one extroverted daughter who is very keen to return to school and one very introverted son who is very anxious about entering grade one.

First and foremost, it is important to assess the temperament trait of transitions and adaptability for each of your family members, through observation and questions. Where does each person fit on Mary Sheedy Kurcinka’s continuum?

1———————–2———————–3————————4——————–5

(Adapts quickly)                                                                               (Adapts slowly)

For example, are you/your child easily able to stop an activity and start another? Do you enjoy surprises?  How much does change bother you/your child?  How easily can you handle changes in routine?  Some people find it very upsetting to have changes in routine, or to end an activity and begin another.

Be Empathetic!

If your child is slow to adapt, it is important to help them understand their temperament.  It is important to validate that change is difficult for them and that ending summer holidays and going back to school is tough.

Be Proactive!

Strategies:

• Help your child recognize transitions
• Create a routine – use pictures or words to make it visual (when children feel in control, and can see what’s next, they transition better)
• Build-in more time – slow-to-adapt children will move slower and more cautiously
• Give advanced warning – “Five more minutes until the timer goes off and play time is over” (sometimes it works better to have something external to indicate the transition time)
• Create closure – “Let’s clean up together and get ready to go to the park” (think about something positive that will happen next), “Let’s put your art on this table and you can finish later” “You can choose one car to bring with you” (transitional object)  – try to find a natural closing point (eg. end of a chapter)
• Incorporate Games – “Let’s pretend we’re on a train and you’re driving me – where should our house be and where can we pretend school is?”
• Plan ahead – Reduce the number of transitions – slow-to-adapt children can only handle a certain amount of transitions before their walls go up
• Validate feelings – Being disappointed involves a transition, as plans have not gone accordingly.

Specific Strategies for Returning to School:

• Create a visual schedule (pictures or words) including who will be picking them up from school
• Choose clothes the night before
• Better to get your child to bed too early than too late – create enough cuddle time that your child can talk about any worries
• Allow ample time to get ready in the morning (and start school hour bed-times now)
• Make lunches together – the night before!
• Write notes in lunch boxes or  for non-readers,  draw an eye, a heart and the letter “U” and teach them what this means
• For young children, choose together, a transitional object to put in their backpack (a teddy bear etc.)
• Keep a family photograph in their backpack

Warmly,